Nativity – Carl Davis

A dockside tavern in a small port on Judea’s Mediterranean Coast.

Hi everyone!  Just old Levi here - fresh back from Bethlehem. What a waste of time that was! There was one good bit, but I’ll come to that later. Well you know how I’m an honest, hard-working, law-abiding merchant – who’s that sniggering? Look, I’ve told you before, that shipment of dodgy wine from Athens had nothing to do with me – nothing. The fact that the prefect received a gift of prime race horses just before my trial was sheer co-incidence - had no bearing on the incident at all. Now, I won’t be side tracked, well not unless the wine comes. Inn keeper! Hurry up with my wine.

Where was I? Ah yes:  going to Bethlehem. All because that jumped up emperor, Augustus, wanted a census. The Romans are always sticking their noses into other people’s affairs. Anyway I had to go to Bethlehem because my family originated from there sometime in the past. I’ve only been there once before, with my grandfather, when I was six, to visit some ancient aunt who could never remember my name. And she smelled of goats.

Well, I was a bit late in starting my journey, which wasn’t helped by getting stuck behind an old ass carrying a pregnant woman and led by some chap dressed in tatty clothes in some remote narrow pass a few miles from Bethlehem. I said “Hallo”, but didn’t linger, and as soon as I could I hurried on as fast as my horse could go. Well, it was getting late. I got to Bethlehem just before dusk. Ah! My wine has arrived - I’ll just take a swig of this and then carry on.  Hmm; not bad this wine. Oh, that’s better!

Now where was I? Just getting to Bethlehem. Well you couldn’t get a decent room for love nor money but I thought myself fortunate to find a ramshackle old inn down some squalid back street. The innkeeper had the cheek to charge me four shekels - four shekels! For a room overlooking the street and for keeping my horse in a tumbledown stable across the way. He also charged two shekels, two shekels, for stale bread, rancid cheese and undrinkable wine from Thrace. The Emperor Augustus has a lot to answer for I can tell you.

After my apology for a meal I decided to settle down for the night. What a night that was. Firstly that couple I’d met briefly on the road earlier came knocking at the door - banging on the door more like. Well I suppose the chap had to bang loudly as there was a bit of an argument going on in the inn’s tavern, and the innkeeper was trying to calm things down. The walls of the inn were so thin that when someone sneezed in the room next to mine I said “Bless you”. And he said, “Thanks!” You could hear everything. The innkeeper opened the door and said there wasn’t any room for them. Well, that’s the polite version, and I’m not going to repeat his exact words! From my window I could see the woman, hardly more than a girl, standing next to the ass. She was holding on to it for support. Well, I’m not really a hard man - Don’t you say a word Ammon! Will you all stop sniggering! Well, as I said, I’m not really a hard man and I was just going to call down that they could share my room -  I was only going to charge them the going rate, four shekels, I couldn’t say fairer than that -  when the innkeeper moderated his tone and said they could use the stable to sleep in. Well I was angry that I’d lost a bit of business but slightly relieved as the chap didn’t look like he had two coins to rub together.

I’d just fallen asleep when I was rudely awakened by a crying baby. Those thin walls kept no sound out. I got out of bed and crossed to the window to close the shutters when the third noisy interruption occurred. I was glad I was awake when I saw who was going into that stable; four shepherds and a dozen or so sheep. Well, only a couple of lambs went inside with the shepherds, the sheep were milling around in the street. I’d had enough and was going to make sure my horse was alright as we all know what roughnecks those hill shepherds can be. It’s not unknown for them to set upon a stranger in their faraway hills; or so I’ve been told. One thing did surprise me, though. No-one else had got up to complain and I felt compelled to leave well alone. Strange that.

Well I got back into bed, forgetting to close the shutters, and drifted off into a fitful sleep, only to be awakened again, this time by a bright light shining through the window. My immediate reaction was that the stable had caught light; the light was so intense. So, out of bed again. But there was no fire - just a bright star, a very bright star. It appeared to be hanging over the stable, and to top it all three foreigners riding camels stopped outside the stable. I knew they were foreigners by their clothes - a bit gaudy - not your usual garment from Damascus Market. And they spoke in a strange language, and had brought with them several boxes of what I couldn’t quite see. The camels bellowed at the sheep, the sheep responded and an ass from inside the stable joined in for good measure. Well this was a rum do I can tell you. But still no-one complained. Strange that.

Things seemed to settle down and I got back into bed. Well you know I can’t function properly without my eight hours. Goodness knows how, but I did get back to sleep, or did I? You see I don’t know if I was awake or asleep when probably the strangest event of that night occurred. I saw a bright figure looking out at that stable from my bedroom window. The figure just stood there watching what was going on. I thought at first it was the innkeeper with a lantern but that went straight out of my mind when the figure turned towards me and smiled. The next thing I knew the innkeeper was bellowing and shouting for everyone to get up, and sunlight was coming into the room. I was surprised that I was refreshed, as if I’d had a good eight hours. I felt certain that the night’s events would be remarked upon, but no-one said a word. Strange that.

Well, I went over to the stable, just to check on my horse, as you do. The queer events of last night were nothing to do with me. If that couple, now with a baby, wanted to get into trouble with the innkeeper for inviting the world and his wife into the stable, well, that was their concern. I had to acknowledge them, just to be polite, nothing more, and I muttered something about the baby being beautiful as you do. My horse was happy munching hay so I left.

The rest of my stay was awful. The Romans and some of Herod’s lackeys were in their element, they wanted to know everything about everything; they even threatened to contact the prefect here to see if my business was kosher. Me! Levi! A more honest and hard working man you’ll never set eyes on.

Who’s that interrupting my flow? Oh, it’s you Aaron. Well sit ye down, sit ye down. You’ve missed the best bit but I’ll tell you later over drink or two. What’s that? You saw the old blind beggar wearing my cloak so you took it off him and brought it to me? Well thanks my old friend, but I gave it to him - gets a touch cold these nights, and I have two more. Tell you what:  go and get the old beggar and bring him here. You can give him back the cloak and he can share a meal with us as I tell both of you about my exploits.

December,  2009.